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Do You Want To Be More Productive?

5/24/2021

Do you wish that you could be more productive? That you could work through your day with more ease, more focus, more energy and feel a sense of accomplishment?

I've been practicing some techniques on how to better manage our brain. These techniques come from a number of sources, but mainly from a wonderful resource called the Global Stress Summit. Leaders in the fields of neuroscience, behavioral science, stress and performance management came together to share the latest research, ideas and techniques for how to optimally manage your time, stress and brain power to maximize your performance.

There are 3 main concepts that I want to share with you in this post. The first 2 are higher level and center around our beliefs and discipline. The 3rd one gets into the nitty gritty detail of how to manage our daily tasks for optimal brain efficiency.

Our beliefs matter
Highly effective people believe that they have enough time every day, every week, and every month to get all of the critical, important and urgent things done.

We are all creating all the time, but most of us don’t know it. When you create, you do it through what you think, feel, and act on. And what you think, feel, and act on is driven by what you believe.

Creation in action is demonstrated by the Mindset Wheel. Your beliefs govern your thoughts, your thoughts guide your actions, your actions produce your experiences, and your experiences reinforce your beliefs. When these belief-thought-action cycles become ingrained, they turn into habits...things you do over and over without consciously thinking about them.

The way you think, feel, and act in any given situation is linked to your belief system. These beliefs control what you experience in your reality. So being aware of what you believe is critical. What we put our attention and energy to appreciates. If we believe we don't have enough time then guess what? We probably won't have enough time. If we believe that we will have enough time then we are more likely to have enough time.

Everyone is disciplined
John Assaraf, CEO of NeuroGym and a brain researcher says, "Everyone is disciplined. You are 100% disciplined to the habits that you've become accustomed to. The question is, are you disciplined to the right things?" I love this. It's not that I lack discipline, I'm just may not disciplined to the right things. That can be a huge mind shift.

Now I can take a look at the things that I am disciplined to and make intentional shifts and changes to more optimal habits.

The Why and How of Task Management
Do you have endless tasks and to do lists floating around in your head? Your brain has limitations as to how much it can process in any given point in time. You also have a limited amount of working memory. Your conscious working memory can only hold about 3 to 4 items at any given time and then it gets overloaded.

The key is to take all of the tasks that are floating around in your head that you want to accomplish and get them down on paper and out of your head. Write it down, organize it and prioritize it. From that list take the top 2 to 3 that have to get done. That you MUST get done. Focus on the critical few versus the trivial many. The less you burn your brain's working memory by trying to juggle a bunch of things/ideas the more you're going to be able to use it for thinking.

Another thing to be aware of is that our brains don't process how long tasks are going to take very well. When you think of how long a task is going to take, your brain will automatically think of one shining example of where everything went right and use that as the example of how long a task will take. The reality is that you should double the length of time that your brain thinks it needs to complete a task. You are more likely to stay motivated if you have realistic goals that you can achieve. Keep this in mind as you decide the 2 to 3 tasks that you will accomplish each day.

Increase your productivity by, believing, being disciplined to the right things, and writing down and choosing 2 to 3 tasks each day to accomplish.

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Are You Sure You're 'Stuck'?

5/17/2021

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When challenges arise, when results aren’t happening fast enough, when self-doubt and fear derail your mind and spirit, do you know how to step back and do an internal diagnostic check-up?

Feeling stuck is nothing new … neither is getting unstuck, nor is it difficult. It is, however, intentional. Through self-awareness, we discover the triggers that contribute to feeling stuck and what we need to do to make a different choice. Ask yourself this … is the word ‘stuck’ even accurate?

Consider the flow of a river. It doesn’t always flow forward. Ebbs cause a river to flow backward, and so, a river both ebbs and flows. A recurrent and rhythmic pattern of coming and going or decline and regrowth … forever moving, not stuck, all part of the cycle of life. Similarly, our lives ebb and flow as well.

Sound familiar? Here are a few tips to consider implementing when you are feeling stuck.

Tip 1 - Where Attention Goes Energy Flows
When you truly aspire to do something, people and forces align to support you. To create the ‘flow’ to make this happen, consider giving your time and attention to what you truly desire. It’s easy to become distracted in today’s world. Although it’s important to be informed, it can become an unhealthy addiction.

Being constantly connected to our devices and the chaos in the world can block your connection to ‘flow’ and cause you to feel stuck. Time slips away and your forward progress can be derailed, not only leaving you feeling stuck, but even making you feel ‘less than’. So, ask yourself, where are you putting your attention?

Tip 2 - Say A Prayer
The river’s current is strongest and most powerful at its source. Like a river, ‘flow’ is most powerful at its Source as well. When feeling stuck, just call out a prayer similar to this one … I’m grateful for your guidance. Guide me toward the ‘flow’. Then sit in stillness, witness God’s presence and listen for the guidance. Being still and turning the volume down allows us to hear the still, small voice of God guiding us.

Prayer is the attention of the heart, and what we give the attention of our heart to matters deeply, because we become what we pay attention to. Whenever you feel ‘stuck’, it’s a call to turn inwards and reconnect to your source of power. When you connect back to your internal compass, you’ll always feel more grounded in your external reality.

Tip 3 - Let Go
In his book, The War of Art, Steven Pressfield writes, “We must do our work for its own sake, not for fortune or attention or applause. Do it as an offering to God.” This is what it means to let go, to surrender. Be intentional about doing the work and let go of the outcome.

Letting go can feel scary. We are biologically wired to want comfort and control and, if they are missing, we quickly feel stuck. When we perform actions and don’t see the immediate results we desire, it causes a perceived lack of control. Let go of the resistance, be in alignment with and open to the blessings that are flowing your way.

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Mindful Cooking And Eating

5/11/2021

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I'm a fast eater. Most of the time I don't even realize that I'm eating fast until someone points it out or I notice that others are taking more time. It's as though I'm afraid that it'll go somewhere if I don't eat it fast. Maybe it comes from being from a big family. There was never a shortage of food, but if I wanted seconds or thirds of my favorite dish I had better eat quick or there might not be any left.

After a while it kind of became my thing...I'm a fast eater. I also tend to eat a lot and eat anything, so I became the girl that eats a lot of anything fast...it became one of my stories. I love food, but didn't take the time to really pay attention to it or savor it.

I also cook fast, and until recently I considered cooking to be a chore. Cooking was a means to an end. I want to give myself and my family good home cooked meals, but I really didn't enjoy the process. It takes time to shop, prepare and clean up the mess and I viewed it at a chore. I didn't appreciate the act of cooking.

A few years ago, I started to realize the importance of not taking for granted the act of creating my food and the act of eating my food. I learned that our food is impacted by our intentions. This changed how I view food, the process of preparing it and the act of eating it.

When we eat, we are taking nature into our bodies. We are changed by what we eat, and in turn, we change what we are eating. Food creates a series of relationships, it links us to other individuals, to nature, to animals.

My rice experiment post demonstrates the power of our intentions. Now I work to be mindful when I prepare food, to intentionally infuse it with love and gratitude. Cooking is an expression of love and an act of giving, it's a profoundly sacred act. By blessing the food and infusing it with love and gratitude, I can positively impact my food. Even when I'm not making the healthiest choice, the food can be positively impacted by my intentions.

There is power in eating. Michael Pollan has written several books about conscious eating. He states that eating is power, that every time we eat we have an opportunity to vote, to express our values. Do I choose pesticides or not? Do I choose local or not? Do I eat animals or not? He suggests that we be conscious about the choices we make and what we eat, because our choices are powerful, it expresses our vote.

Michael Pollan's books talk about how many of our current problems are do to the collapse of home cooking. He states that on average we spend 27 minutes per day prepping food and 4 minutes per day cleaning up. Anyone who has ever prepared even a simple meal knows that it takes a lot longer than that to prep and clean up, suggesting that most of the food is highly processed and purchased already prepared. He also notes that 46% of meals in America are eaten alone.

Corporations are cooking our food and the industry doesn't cook very well. They are not necessarily interested in our satisfaction with the food or our health and well being, they are interested in our cravings for fat, sugar and salt. They engineer the food so that we crave it.

Michael Pollan offers up the following advice on food:

-Eat only foods that have been cooked by humans.
-Don't eat anything that your great-grandmother wouldn't recognize as food.
-Eat only foods that will eventually rot.
-Don't get your fuel from the same place your car does.

I am working to be more mindful about honoring the food that I am making and eating. Taking time to think about where the food is coming from and to be grateful for it and for the effort of those that produced it for me. Infusing it with love and gratitude.

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Forgiveness...How We Get Stuck And What We Can Do About It

5/4/2021

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Last week’s post explored the link between forgiveness and wellness, the choice to forgive, and facing the pain. This week let’s continue exploring forgiveness with things that keep us stuck and what we can do about it.

Based on the work of Dr Robert Enright, two big things that keep us stuck are resentment and revenge.

Resentment...Holding onto a deep-seated grudge against someone who has hurt or offended us. Words like, “I hate you," "I will never forgive you,” or “You’ll pay for that,” show resentment. We can get addicted to the high that comes from allowing our hurt to manifest in resentment. Holding onto resentment can become a habitual response to people or circumstances that do not meet with our approval, and it can create the habitual need for revenge.

Revenge...Revenge is defined as persistent ill will, a deep need to retaliate against someone who has offended us by hurting someone/anyone as badly as we’ve been hurt. Revenge can also be a desire to teach someone a lesson they won’t forget. In its more subtle form, we might abandon the offender and/or withhold communication from her or him as punishment. Such behavior can easily spiral downward into depression and can become an obsessive compulsion. Words like, “I was hurt, so it’s okay for me to hurt anyone who gets in my way,” “What goes around comes around,” “Serves you right,” or “God will get you for this” are all expressions of the desire for revenge.

What can we do to get ourselves unstuck? Dr. Enright offers two keys to getting unstuck and moving toward forgiveness.

The First Step…It may feel like hurting others is the only way to deal with our pain, but there is another way…forgiveness. Before we can forgive, we need to stop allowing ourselves to react to negative situations with resentment. Sharing our feelings is a great starting point because often the offender doesn’t have a clue that their words/actions were hurtful. At a minimum, communication can validate our experience, and it might even open the door to new understanding. This doesn’t always help, but often times it’s a catalyst to understanding and healing.

Offering Yourself Forgiveness…Along with forgiving others, we also need to consider offering ourselves forgiveness. Forgiving yourself for not knowing what you didn’t know before you learned it. Forgiving yourself for not being smart enough, for not recognizing the signs, for making a poor decision, etc.

In order to truly get to a place where we can be a forgiving person, we need to start with ourselves. When you find that you are berating yourself for choices you made, opportunities missed, people you misjudged, behaviors you condoned…the first step is to stop and tell yourself "No more." Start exercising self-compassion and be a kind to yourself. Over and over again, start by easing up on yourself. Letting go of resentments and judgments of yourself first.

Once you start easing up on yourself, you’ll find it easier to ease up on others. Realizing that what you need, so do they. If I make mistakes and deserve to be forgiven, so too do they. If I hurt another and can be forgiven and move on, so too can they. If I have been critical and judgmental of someone and can be forgiven, so too can they. Give what you are seeking for yourself.

Forgiveness Techniques…I've worked with several forgiveness techniques over the years, including several meditation techniques. Finding what works best for you is key. I believe it’s important to see forgiveness as a process, it usually doesn’t happen overnight. Depending on the depth of the wound, it can take several months. Here's what I practice:

Start by being clear with yourself on this question, “Do I want to be right or do I want to be happy?” Make practicing forgiveness a daily practice, a daily devotion, a daily intention to forgive yourself and others.

Be willing to look inward and ask yourself, “What was my role in the situation?” In some situations this is absolutely not part of the equation, but in most everyday relationship situations it is. Exercising empathy is an important piece to forgiveness. I remind myself that I'm seeing things through my own lens, from my perspective and that there are many other viewpoints, angles and possibilities. Ask yourself, “What did I bring to the table and what can I learn from it?” Be curious and try to obtain a full understanding of the situation.

Pray for that person’s happiness for 30 days every day for 5 minutes. If I pray for somebody one of 2 things will happen…either they will behave differently or I won’t care. Your greatest power to change the world is your power to change your mind about the world. And remember, everything is energy. If you are sending out healing energy versus resentment, that person will receive it and be impacted by it. Don't discount the impact this ripple, this blessing, may have.

As Marianne Williamson says, ”In the beginning it's really hard, but so what? Is it easy to sit there with the anger and bitterness and toxicity and blame? It's so much easier to bless someone versus blame them, not immediately, but long-term."

Forgiveness is not about forgetting, but about letting go. It's about choosing positive emotions over negative ones. I'm working on building my forgiveness muscle. Each day I'm setting my intention to forgive myself and others and to have a willingness to forgive. Each day I'm praying for the happiness of those I desire to forgive. Each day I'm choosing positive emotions over negative emotions. Each day we get to choose.

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Do You Want To Be More Productive?

Are You Sure You're 'Stuck'?

Mindful Cooking And Eating

Forgiveness...How We Get Stuck And What We Can Do About It

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