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Big Bold Bright Sparkly Ripples of Reflection and Resolution

12/29/2015

As 2015 is coming to a close and the new year is approaching, most of us are reflecting on the past year and planning for the new year. Reflecting on how the year went, what we accomplished, making resolutions, setting goals on things that we plan to do in the new year.

What reflections do you have about this past year? Did you accomplish what you desired? What positive experiences were in your life? I invite you to make a list of all your accomplishments from the year, both big and small. What did you achieve? Consider putting your list someplace visible, so you can savor them and be reminded of your achievements.

What challenges did you experience? Consider going through each one looking at what effect they’ve had on your life. There might be lessons you learned through these challenges, setbacks, or disappointments. A great way to heal from negative experiences is to learn from them.

I think it's healthy to productively reflect, to productively look back for a bit before setting it aside and moving forward. Not getting stuck in the past, just looking at it to savor the positive and learn from the challenges.

What are you resolving to do in 2016? Have you thought about it yet? Have you envisioned what the year ahead will look like for you? Have you set a few goals for yourself?

How are you feeling about the new year? I know a lot of us have mixed feelings as we are looking out at our world. We want to change, we desire change. How is that change going to happen for you? Are you willing to be the change that you want in the world? Are you willing to do your part to be to create the change in your own life, in order for that to ripple out into the world? To create big bold bright sparkly ripples of positive change?

If you desire the world to be a healthier and happier place, than be healthier yourself, be happy yourself. If you desire the world to be a place of more love and peace, than be more love and peace yourself. If you desire more acceptance, more compassion, more tolerance, more forgiveness, than be more accepting, be more compassionate, be more tolerant, be more forgiving. Ripple them out to the rest of the world. Create big bold bright sparkly ripples!

Grow these qualities in yourself and they will create huge ripples out to the rest of the universe. Create habits within your daily life to support those things that you wish to see not only in your own life, but also in the world. It's time to be the change, to be a change agent. The world is hurting, people are hurting, it is time for each and everyone of us to do our part to be the change. How can you be the change? How can you create big bold bright sparkly ripples in your own life that will ripple out into the world?

What is causing you to be stuck? Stuck in your life? Stuck in your body? Stuck in your mind? Stuck spiritually? Make some movement, make some resolutions, make some change. I invite you to BE the CHANGE you desire to see in the world. This year I want to focus on being the change. This year I want to focus on making big bold bright sparkly positive ripples of change, will you join me? We can do this! We can each make important ripples in our lives and in the lives of those around us. Let's do it!!!

What does 2016 look like for you? What ripples of change are you going to create in your life that will ripple out to the world? I would love to hear your thoughts and your plans!

I will leave you with the insightful words of Wayne Dyer.

You become what you think about. If you think about giving, as God does, the Universe will provide. If you think about things being taken away, then that’s what you’ll attract. If you want to manifest your dreams, you must become a master at monitoring the thoughts and feelings you are aligning yourself with. Your thoughts and feelings become your reality, so become adept at observing the thoughts and feelings you are creating for yourself.

Do not let your imagination be restricted to the current conditions of your life, or what I call “being obsessed with what is.” Keep reminding yourself that everything that you’ve believed has gotten you to precisely the point where you are now. This is a rather persistent theme in my work, so it bears repeating here: if you want to elevate your life and become a manifester, then you have to change what you’ve believed to be true about yourself that has landed you where you are. The sentiments of This is reality, This is just the way things are, There is nothing that I can do to change what is, and the like are pernicious thoughts that will taint and defile your great gift of I am that I am, which is your Divine inheritance from your creator.

The words of all the great spiritual teachers encourage us to see ourselves as unlimited and to know that even the least among us has the divine power of God available at every moment of our lives. I know that you, if you practice studiously, can begin to manifest for yourself virtually anything that you are capable of conceiving in your mind. You must unplug from your conditioning and know in that private space behind your eyes that you can and will take on the challenge of manifesting your destiny. It is my belief that you are never given the power to dream without the equivalent power to manifest that dream and make it your physical reality.

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Hit the Pause Button

12/22/2015

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Are you feeling rushed, stressed, anxious about the holidays and everything you still need to get done? This time of year can feel overwhelming with all the gift buying and wrapping, the decorating and cookie baking, the Christmas cards and holiday parties, the task list can seem endless! Sometimes we rush through the experience feeling exhausted and not really even enjoying the season.

I invite you to hit the pause button and for just a moment take a deep breath. Slow down just for a few minutes, relax your shoulders, relax your jaw, take another deep breath. Center yourself just for a moment and breathe deeply. Roll your shoulders forward a few times and backward a few times. It's all good, you've got this, you have totally got this! Inhale in the smells of the holidays and exhale out the busyness.

Maybe you want everything to be picture perfect, please know that it doesn't have to be. If you are feeling really stressed, what can you let go...besides your sleep? Can you skip one batch of cookies? Can you pass on scrubbing the kitchen floor? You know they will all be walking all over it and it'll just get dirty again right? Think about it, what can you let go to make life a little easier, so you can enjoy more and stress less?

Remember to enjoy, to savor the holiday times together. Remember to reflect upon the real reason for the season. Remember to look at it through the lens of a child. Look at your family and friends, the manger with baby Jesus, the lights and the presents, the food and the treats all with child-like wonder, child-like awe, child-like curiosity, excitement and the belief in miracles.

Hit the pause button and take a moment to be grateful. Express your gratitude for all of the many blessings in your life. What do you have right now in this moment to be grateful for? Let that be your focus, center on that.

As you are busying through the next few days, I invite you to take several moments to hit the pause button and take a deep breath. Center yourself and soak in the moment. Be present and for the moment remember and soak in what you are doing, what you are creating, what you are enjoying, what you are grateful for. Stop, look and listen to all of the lights, the beauty, the sounds all around you. Savor the moment, just for a few minutes at least and breathe deeply. Inhale in the smells of the holidays and exhale out the busyness. You've totally got this!

Wishing you and your family a very merry and joyous Christmas!

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Peace or Happiness?

12/15/2015

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I went to seminar recently where the presenter's topic of conversation centered around the idea of peace. The presenter's idea was that our daily goal, our daily intention, should be to have peace in our life. Sounds like a great idea and intention or goal to have. She then moved on to incorporate the idea that peace was really the only thing that was important and sustainable, that our goal should not be happiness, because it's not realistic to sustain happiness. Hmmm it's realistic to sustain peace, however it's not realistic to sustain happiness?

She drew an oval loop like the one I have pictured above. She described that during life you are continuously traveling around the loop. You'll encounter good experiences at the top of the loop, and unpleasant or negative experiences at the bottom of the loop. Her contention was that throughout this loop of life, that it was impossible to sustain happiness, but possible to sustain peace. An interesting thought. It seems to me that they both take a lot of awareness and conscious effort to consistently sustain, but that it is possible to sustain them both a majority of the time.

For me, it's simply not acceptable to just live in peace as a goal. It seems to me that I could be peacefully stuck in the bottom of the loop. I could be peacefully stuck in a depressive state, I could be at peace to a certain degree with the negativity. For me, it's about not getting stuck in the muck and being peaceful at the same time. For me, it's how do I move myself through this experience as gracefully, as productively, and as swiftly as possible? For me, there's a duality involved...maintain my peace as a goal, but sustaining my happiness is also a goal.

This view of happiness as being dependent upon a set of circumstances is an outdated view. Positive psychology has proven that not only is it possible to sustain happiness, but that there is a huge advantage to sustaining happiness and positivity. Scientists have also determined that your happiness is only 10% based upon external factors, 90% is based upon how your brain processes. So, when you are in the bottom of the loop, just like with peace, your happiness will be more dependent on how your brain processes the experience.

ALL of these things are a choice. A choice as to what your goal is for your life and what your intention is for your life. They all take awareness and a conscious decision and choice whether it be peace, or happiness, or love, or gratitude, or forgiveness, or compassion, they are all a choice.

Certainly there are cycles to life, we've all witnessed the ebb and flow, but is peace enough to have as a daily goal? Personally, I choose to be happy, to be positive, to be optimistic and for so many reasons. First of all, it just feels better and secondly there are proven amazing benefits to my health, my productivity, my creativity, my relationships, my success.

Peace is an awesome intention, but I desire for more. It's not satisfactory, to me, to set my daily intention as one of only peace, that's not good enough for me, I want more. I choose to set my daily intention for peace and happiness. And while I'm at it, I choose to set my daily intention for love, gratitude, forgiveness, and compassion too. It's a tall order yes, but an attainable and sustainable one.

I've heard people lately try to trivialize the notion of being happy. And I question where does that end? Should we then question the idea of being consistently grateful, because how can we be grateful when all these bad things happen in life? Should we question the concept of love, because how can we love when all of these bad things happen? And really what is holding us back? Yes we are human, yes we are flawed, things happen in life, does that mean we need to concede to being stuck in the muck? Does that mean we need to concede to only achieving peace? Does that mean that we shouldn't set our intention on being happy? What does that mean for you?

I believe that there's more fun to be had. I believe in infinite possibilities. I believe that peace and happiness and love and gratitude are all possible. I believe we have a choice as to whether we choose to be positive, or we choose to be negative. What do you think? I would love to hear from you!

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Comparison is the Thief of Joy

12/8/2015

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Do you ever get caught in the trap of comparing yourself to others? Comparing your body to others, comparing your job to others, comparing your story to others, comparing what you have to others, comparing your skills and talents to those of others, comparing your kids to others, comparing where you are in life to others, comparing your generosity to others, comparing your happiness to others, and on and on and on.

Especially at this time of the year we can fall into the comparison trap. Whether it's who is getting what for Christmas, or what other's holiday plans look like. Or maybe it's reflecting on the year as it's coming to an end and comparing the path that your life has taken compared to others. Or whether it's looking toward the upcoming year and comparing what might lie ahead for you to others. However you slice it comparison is stealing your contentment, stealing your happiness, stealing your joy. Drawing a comparison between ourself, and our life, to that of others is a reflection of our dissatisfaction with ourself.

When comparing our life to someone else's we are drawing a comparison to what our perception is of that other person and their life, which may or may not reflect reality. Remember the old saying the grass is always greener? I feel that comparing is judging, making a determination of what appears to be better than the other. Comparing ourselves with someone else is an inaccurate and irrelevant measuring stick.

Either way you cut it, comparison doesn't feel good. You either feel like you're on the short end which makes you feel negative about your situation, or you feel like you're on the uptick. Whenever we have to play the comparison game in order to make ourselves feel good, in order to fill a hole within us, by proving that we are somehow bigger and better ends up not filling that hole. It's a never-ending dark hole of dissatisfaction. At its core, at its heart, righteousness comes from a feeling of lack. What I lack in myself, I seek to puff up through my righteousness. It’s impossible for us to sustain happiness in our lives if we jump into the comparison game.

We all were born unique, different from everybody else in our own splendidly authentic variation. The only masterful creation we have to work with is ourself. It's more productive and useful for us to focus on being the best version of ourself that we can be.

I invite you to get out of the comparison mode. Instead work on being the best version of yourself that you can be. Instead remember how grateful you are for where you are in the present moment. Instead exercise self-love and self-compassion with who you are and where you are in life. Enjoy the journey with the knowledge that it is your journey and your story, not anyone else's.

Were you able to complete a random act of kindness this past week? I would love to hear about it! Let's challenge ourselves to reach out again this week and brighten someone's day with another act of kindness. Let's finish out 2015 with some brightness!!!

I am trying something new this week! It was suggested to me that I include a video of my weekly blog post to make it easier for some to hear me while they are commuting to and from work, or while exercising, or making dinner, instead of waiting to read it. So, here is my very first blog video! I wasn't planning to post it this week, I was just playing around with how to do it, but I decided what the heck why not include it! Yikes, I am not comparing myself to those who do this all the time :)

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I don't have a story...

12/1/2015

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Recently I was at a confirmation program retreat with my daughter. We were sitting around a table of 7 people. The program speaker gave us an overview of her "life story". She detailed when and where she was born and stepped us through major milestones in her life. She then asked us to take a few minutes to go around the table and for each of us to share our life story with everyone at the table. There was a man who we didn't know and his 12 year old son at our table. When it was a gentleman's turn, he said simply, "I don't have a story." Just then the speaker told us that our time was up and started moving on speaking about something else. I was left sitting with the empty feeling of his words..."I don't have a story." They struck me hard. I wanted to say to him, "What do you mean you don't have a story? Of course you have a story, everyone has a story." I felt bad, he was obviously suffering and I felt that it must have been a hard thing for his son to hear too. I could feel and the sadness radiating from him and through his confession.

When the speaker was done, we all got up and moved on to the next scheduled event. The gentleman looked at us and thanked us for joining him and his son at their table. They were sitting alone prior to us joining them. They were the only ones there from their church and he said they felt awkward prior to us sitting with them. I didn't see the man or his son again.

I have thought about this brief interaction several times since that evening. To be honest it has really bothered me. What was his mindset that he felt he didn't have a story? There was an emptiness and a sadness about him and his son, like a dark cloud was hovering over them. Could I, should I, have done more to comfort, council or help him? What was his story?

We ALL have a story. An imperfectly, perfect story. We have a story, even if our story isn't what we wish for our story to be, we still have a story. Telling our stories allows us to connect with one another, but most importantly it allows us to connect with ourselves. As Brene Brown says, "When we deny our stories, they define us." What you choose to do with your story is your choice.

What's your story? Do you like it so far? What would you change about it if you could rewrite it? Are you in the beginning, the middle, or the end of your story? How would you finish writing your perfectly imperfect story?

This gentleman's story along with all of the other stories of sadness occurring in our world recently can leave us with a heavy heart. What is the right thing to do in these situations? What is the Christian thing to do? What would Christ do? I realize that the issues are complicated and that there are a lot of considerations and that sometimes there is no easy answer. Let's at least challenge ourselves to stop and think about what Jesus would do.

I have been praying for a lot of people lately. I have also been relying on exercising empathy, compassion, and love. Challenging myself to not operate from a place of fear, but rather from the place of love. I also know that when I feel helpless from afar that I can go to my compassion meditation, I have my tools. This not only helps me, but sends good energy, compassionate energy, out into the world.

My desire to bring more happiness into the world is also strengthened. The world, and the people in it, need more happiness. We need to learn how to bring more positivity into our lives and to those around us and less negativity. I look forward living in a world where there is more positivity than negativity and I know it'll happen, people are hungry for it to happen.

I invite you to do something small today to impact the world in a positive way. Do a random act of kindness, offer someone an encouraging word, praise someone for doing something good or for a strength they have, tell someone you are grateful for them and why, smile and wave at your neighbor. Nothing that will take a lot of effort, time or money, just something small and simple. Spread some happiness, spread some light, spread some love. You never know, your positive deed may have a huge impact on someone else's life. It'll make you feel good and tip the scales in the world toward happy stories.

I would love to hear your feedback on this post. Please leave me a comment or drop me an email. It would be great to hear about your random acts of kindness :)

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Big Bold Bright Sparkly Ripples of Reflection and Resolution

Hit the Pause Button

Peace or Happiness?

Comparison is the Thief of Joy

I don't have a story...

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