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The God In Me Is Loving The God In You

6/28/2022

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What is your typical response when you become frustrated, angered or upset? Maybe you are having a disagreement with your spouse or coworker, or you are 'having one of those days' with your kids, or your family member is pushing one of your buttons. It can be easy to engage in the hot mess. Even if we don't engage it can be a challenge to let things go without stewing and fretting about it in an unproductive way. I've learned several amazing tools that have helped me to center myself and regulate my emotions in situations like these with a lot more grace. I want to share one of them with you today.  

This is a tool that I learned in a spirituality class. It's simple, easy and works fast to help me remain centered and intentional. Whenever you are confronted with a situation that is challenging and runs the risk of getting the better of you, repeat to yourself out loud or silently, "The God in me is loving the God in ____" and insert the name of the person(s) impacted. Repeat this over and over for a few minutes until you feel the shift happening inside of you. Even if you have to grit your teeth and choke it out at first, do it anyway. You will be surprised how after saying it a few times, your own thoughts and energy will begin to shift.  

Now the super cool thing about this is that it not only begins to shift you, it also can have the impact of shifting the other person, and they are not even consciously aware that you are doing it. You may notice that they calm down and that their energy becomes more stable. Remember how thoughts become things and impact our environment and what comes back at us?  Well, this is another powerful example of how this can work.

This tool can also be used if you are in need of shifting the energy in the room to a more positive one. If you are in a meeting and the energy is turning negative, or your family is having an off day. You may not notice the shift happen, but rest assured you are having an energetic impact on some level.

I love how Pamla Ashlay-McPherson describes this tool.  "People address each other from the part of themselves that has been programmed by this earth life; they forget they are spirit first encased in a body and when we address each other from our spirit to their spirit we speak greater truths. So next time someone is yelling or upset; be still, and in your head repeat over and over, 'The God in me is loving the God in you' and they will stop; as it will bring them to a greater truth without realizing it."

So, next time you are in a challenging situation that threatens your ability to stay in a calm and loving place use this tool, repeat ... The God in me is loving the God in you ... and feel and watch what happens.  

"We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience." The quote is by Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, a French philosopher and Jesuit priest.
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Before You Speak, Let Your Words Pass Through Three Gates

6/20/2022

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We've all heard the phrase, "Think before you speak" right? I've heard it and I've worked on practicing it, but boy sometimes it's easy to quickly respond and say something, or to remain in old patterns. Sometimes I speak and then wish I hadn't. I wish I would have made a better choice, wish I could pull the words back into my mouth. Ever had a time (or two) like that?

Our words have power, they are impactful to ourselves and to others. Some words of wisdom that I have found helpful are from the poet Rumi, “Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates. At the first gate, ask yourself, ‘Is it true?’ At the second ask, ‘Is it necessary?’ At the third gate ask, ‘Is it kind?”

You take one gate at a time and move through the process to determine what, if, when and how this communication should take place. 

Gate #1:  Is it true?
Is what you are about to say true? Is it factual? This not only addresses whether the communication is hearsay, but also whether it's based on perception. Use this gate to determine if this is perception or fact. If it's truth, you can move on to Gate #2.


Gate #2: Is it necessary?
There is an old yogic wisdom that goes something like, “If your words aren’t benefiting the universe don’t say them.” The idea is don’t allow your ego to do the speaking.

Another way to look at this one is to ask yourself, "Does it add value?" and/or "Does it improve the silence?" 

This also brings up the concept of being right. Sometimes we feel a strong need to be right at all costs. You may want to ask yourself, "Do you want peace or do you want to be right?"

If it's true and it's necessary, you can move on to Gate #3. 

Gate #3: Is it kind?
Is what you are about to say kind and compassionate? Is the timing of it being said kind and compassionate? Are the words and the phrasing that you are choosing kind and loving or frustrated and harsh? 

​You are the gatekeeper of your words. Sometimes we need to take a moment to stop and to think before we speak. It helps me to stop and take a deep belly breath in and then push it all out a couple of times. This helps me to interrupt my normal pattern, my normal response, my normal mode of operation and consider a different approach...which may include silence :)
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Your Beliefs Impact Your Genes

6/14/2022

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I love learning about impactful research being done in many different scientific areas. One area of research I've enjoyed learning about is called epigenetics. New research in the area of epigenetics is demonstrating that our genes don't control us, that we control our genes.

​What scientists are finding is that our beliefs can change our biology. Certain combinations of genes can be turned on or off depending greatly on our frame of mind ... what your mind perceives and believes. Our environment, including our thoughts, our feelings, and our belief systems influences genetic activity. 

One of the scientists pioneering this area of research is Dr. Bruce Lipton. He explains, "You have the gene, but depending on how you live, how you respond, what your belief systems are, the expression of gene could be modified. Genes don't control anything, that they are just blueprints. Whereas 'epigenetic control' ... control above the genes ... turns everything on its head. The environment influences the selection and reading of genes. A person's health isn't generally a reflection of genes, but how their environment is influencing them."

He says that, "Between one-third and two-thirds of all healing is down to the placebo effect, not therapies, drugs or surgery. The placebo is just a sugar-pill – the patient is healed by the belief they'll get better: positive thinking. The nocebo effect is equally powerful, caused by negative thoughts. The belief you have a terminal illness can actually cause you to die, and negative thinking is much more common. Not just from yourself, but also the thoughts of people who are around you."

It's awesome when science is able to bring forth evidence that demonstrates the power of our minds, our thoughts, words, feelings, beliefs and actions. It supports and reinforces practices that I have personally experienced the benefits of putting into action. 

Being mindful, living in the present, choosing intentional practices for positivity and, maybe most importantly, undoing the subconscious programming that we've been cultured to believe.  
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Fill Yourself And Others With Love

6/6/2022

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A simple and yet powerful tool to help build not only self-love, but also love for others is called Metta meditation or loving kindness meditation. Sending loving energy to yourself and to others can boost well-being and reduce stress. A regular practice of a loving kindness meditation also increases our capacity for forgiveness, connection to others and self-acceptance.

The loving kindness meditation is a simple repetition of a set of phrases. There are a handful of phrases that are commonly used, you can modify the phrases to ones that resonate with you. During the meditation, you generate loving and kind intentions toward yourself and others.

Here are the phrases that I use:

May I be healthy
May I be happy
May I be filled with love and ease

First directing the phrases toward yourself, then toward someone you are thankful or have unconditional love for, then toward someone you feel neutral about, then toward someone who is frustrating you, and then to the Universe as a whole and to all beings. Repeating each as many times as you would like. 


During the meditation bask in feelings of warmth and self-compassion. If your attention drifts, gently redirect it back to these feelings of loving kindness. 

This meditation is something that I practice while sitting in meditation, but also as I am taking a walk, or doing some other type of routine task.


A loving kindness meditation cultivates our natural capacity for an open and loving heart, something that we can all benefit from now and always. Use this practice as an anchor to feeling grounded, content and loving towards yourself and toward others.
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