Braving the Hot Mess
Check out Braving the Hot Mess on Facebook
  • Blog
  • My Story
  • Documentaries and Videos Worth Your Time
  • Books I Love
  • Vegan Recipes
  • Meditations
  • Affirmations
  • Tracy's Upcoming Events
  • Contact
  • Testimonials

Before You Speak, Let Your Words Pass Through Three Gates

6/20/2022

 
Picture
We've all heard the phrase, "Think before you speak" right? I've heard it and I've worked on practicing it, but boy sometimes it's easy to quickly respond and say something, or to remain in old patterns. Sometimes I speak and then wish I hadn't. I wish I would have made a better choice, wish I could pull the words back into my mouth. Ever had a time (or two) like that?

Our words have power, they are impactful to ourselves and to others. Some words of wisdom that I have found helpful are from the poet Rumi, “Before you speak, let your words pass through three gates. At the first gate, ask yourself, ‘Is it true?’ At the second ask, ‘Is it necessary?’ At the third gate ask, ‘Is it kind?”

You take one gate at a time and move through the process to determine what, if, when and how this communication should take place. 

Gate #1:  Is it true?
Is what you are about to say true? Is it factual? This not only addresses whether the communication is hearsay, but also whether it's based on perception. Use this gate to determine if this is perception or fact. If it's truth, you can move on to Gate #2.


Gate #2: Is it necessary?
There is an old yogic wisdom that goes something like, “If your words aren’t benefiting the universe don’t say them.” The idea is don’t allow your ego to do the speaking.

Another way to look at this one is to ask yourself, "Does it add value?" and/or "Does it improve the silence?" 

This also brings up the concept of being right. Sometimes we feel a strong need to be right at all costs. You may want to ask yourself, "Do you want peace or do you want to be right?"

If it's true and it's necessary, you can move on to Gate #3. 

Gate #3: Is it kind?
Is what you are about to say kind and compassionate? Is the timing of it being said kind and compassionate? Are the words and the phrasing that you are choosing kind and loving or frustrated and harsh? 

​You are the gatekeeper of your words. Sometimes we need to take a moment to stop and to think before we speak. It helps me to stop and take a deep belly breath in and then push it all out a couple of times. This helps me to interrupt my normal pattern, my normal response, my normal mode of operation and consider a different approach...which may include silence :)
Vidmate link
1/31/2023 07:22:51 am

Never agree with an aquarius to please them. They will see through this and are not interested in partners that are not intellectually challenging.

Tutuapp link
1/31/2023 07:23:12 am

During a discussion of, say, a current event, unabashedly share your thoughts. Even if an aquarius disagrees, they will be thrilled at the opportunity to have a rich intellectual discussion.

Choosing the Right Motherboard link
7/24/2024 11:02:00 pm

One of the most important aspects of choosing the best motherboard for a PC build is selecting one with up-to-date features and support for emerging technologies. Choosing a motherboard with these capabilities allows the PC to keep up with future software and hardware demands.

Buddy Locator link
7/31/2024 04:59:59 am



GPS is a system of 30+ navigation satellites circling Earth. We know where they are because they constantly send out signals. A GPS receiver in your phone listens for these signals. Once the receiver calculates its distance from four or more GPS satellites, it can figure out where you are.

publication 4557 link
8/3/2024 03:33:29 am

A person can use Wisp to purchase medications, access consultations with a physician, or subscribe to a recurring plan for prescription refills. Prices vary depending on the service or treatment a person chooses. Wisp's subscription plans are quarterly, so the service takes payment every 3 months.

Blogger Outreach link
12/30/2024 03:56:46 am

Our expert team identifies and connects with top-tier bloggers in your niche to secure guest posting opportunities, sponsored content placements, and other mutually beneficial collaborations.

invest in gold IRA link
1/29/2025 02:21:35 am

Gold IRA reviews" refers to online testimonials and evaluations of companies that specialize in Gold Individual Retirement Accounts (IRAs). These reviews provide insights into various aspects of these companies.


Comments are closed.

    RSS Feed

    Archive 

    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    August 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    December 2017
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    May 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    February 2017
    January 2017
    December 2016
    November 2016
    October 2016
    September 2016
    August 2016
    July 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016
    April 2016
    March 2016
    February 2016
    January 2016
    December 2015
    November 2015
    October 2015
    September 2015
    August 2015
    July 2015
    June 2015
    May 2015
    April 2015
    March 2015
    February 2015
    January 2015

    Picture

      Please sign up to receive weekly new blog posts. 

    Submit
Proudly powered by Weebly