I really appreciated what he had to say about what he calls living in a beautiful state or a suffering state, so I want to share some of his message with you in this post.
Tony's overriding message is that you don't have to tolerate the life that you have, even if it's good, that you don't have to settle. He says to strive for having a great, magnificent and outstanding life.
He believes that there are two states of being that we live in, either a beautiful state of being or a suffering state of being. The beautiful state of being represents happiness, love and peace. In the beautiful state of being you do the right thing and no one has to tell you, it's automatic. You also treat yourself and others well. The suffering state of being represents stress, worry, depression, frustration and anger. He believes that we have the ability to move back and forth between these two states of being and that it's our choice whether we allow ourselves to remain in a suffering state of being.
I've discussed this concept in many of my previous posts. It's called your resilience or your "stickiness", however I appreciate how he describes the two states and what he has to say about them. Tony says, "If you don't manage your mind you can have everything and still be in pain, still be suffering. The mind is not designed to make you happy, it's designed to make you survive and it does that by fear. The brain looks for what's wrong through flight or fight mode. We need to shake ourselves out of that. Our minds can take us over unless our heart is what's running us." Our minds can work for us or against us at any given moment. In next week's post I'll share some information on managing our minds, in particular our thoughts. I love this James Allen quote, "All that you achieve and all that you fail to achieve is the direct result of your own thoughts."
Tony believes that, "Life is too short to suffer, we can raise the bar on what we call suffering, so we can see it for what it is and realize that we can free ourselves from it. Problems need energy to live and some things you just don't give them energy and they are much easier to solve. It's easier to solve things in a beautiful state." I've mentioned in previous posts that our brains are more creative and able to problem solve in a positive, broaden and build state versus when in a negative, or flight or fight state (more on this next week).
Tony goes on to say that, "Expectations for yourself or others get us in trouble. They put us in a box and they bring on a suffering state. You can free yourself when you trade your expectations for appreciation. Breathe into your heart, be curious about your thoughts, be appreciative for this moment, and something in it. Consider making the most important decision of your life… I will not suffer anymore. It's not fake, it's not funny, it's not placated, it's not sweep it under the rug, it's saying life is short and knowing that life is beautiful and rich and I want to be joyful."
So how do we maximize our beautiful state of being and minimize our suffering state of being? I believe that this requires having an intentional practice and a variety of tools in your toolbox. If you would like to learn more about maximizing your beautiful state of being, I invite you to join me for our next Happiness Workshop 3-part series September 14, 21 and 28 from 6-8 pm. You can register at http://bit.ly/HappinessClinic. In the workshop you will learn about the science behind happiness, the advantages to living a happy life (some of these will surprise you), quick and easy habits and tools to incorporate into your everyday life, as well as long-term strategies for well-being.
I would love to hear your feedback on this post. What do you think about the beautiful state of being and suffering state of being? Do you currently live in a beautiful state of being or a suffering state of being? Do you have the tools in your toolbox to help you navigate life's challenges and maximize your happiness, love and peaceful state? Please leave me a comment or send me an email.